The busiest time?
Finally, today I got a green light from my first reader in my second special field paper that he approved my work! That's such a relief ... considering that my proposal defense is only 10 days away, and I need to get that paper approved before that. I thought my Fall 2005 semester was intense, but it looks like this month is even more intense. Finishing a special field paper (that is, the second comprehensive exam in the program), a proposal, and defending the proposal..., while still working on campus with the project getting more intense as well with the evaluation.
Well, I'm crossing my fingers now that the forms will be submitted on time for the hearing.
I learned a lot from this experience...
Looking back in my life, I have had several intense school times. The first one was during my undergraduate study, the seventh semester, which was my final one, when I took the thesis and the final project at the same time. Also in that semester I took two assignment-intensive classes.
That time, I thought it was the most intense school time of my life.
Little that I knew, I would be going to school much longer than that. I thought I was done with school. Then, I went to Singapore to get my MA in Urban Design, and, wow, my MAUDite friends can surely testify for the sleepless nights in the studio, nearing the deadline. Especially in the second semester, when we had to work on the studio plus the thesis (a.k.a. dissertation in the program)...
I thought that was it, that was my most intense school time.
Little that I knew, I would be going to school much longer than that. Well, I knew that I was going to go to the United States for another degree, but I thought it would only take me two years. Wrong. I ended up continuing to the Ph.D. program (what was I thinking when I made that decision??) and got caught in funding issues. I had to work to pay for my health insurance fee in the Fall of 2005, because I have spent all my savings to pay for a 3-month empty room during the summer. I asked for an Academic Training to ensure my legal status and worked 40 hours a week (being a graduate fellow at CURL and teach Mass Media at the same time) while still taking 3 classes.
I thought that was it, that was my most intense school time.
I told myself that I would never ever do that again -- taking 3 classes and teach a class and work on campus at the same time.
But, hey, who would have expected that graduate school deadlines are so early in the year? After I thought I have missed the Schmitt Dissertation Fellowship deadline, at the end of January I got informed that the Grad School has another fellowship opportunity and the deadline was later than the Schmitt. The thing is, I had to defend my proposal before March 12. After forming my committee, the only time they can be present together in one room before March 12 is February 26. Before that, I had to go through my second special fields, which was a 55-page theoretical paper.
Seriously... February is not the longest month to work on things! It only has 28 days! So, here I am, with all these papers and books around me. And as if it's not crazy enough, I also scheduled my class presentation, the incomplete class from last semester, on February 27. Then, there are also the Chinese New Year celebrations that I have to participate in. And the rest of this month... well, I have told you this story in the first paragraph.
This time, I will not take this as the most intense school time in my life anymore.
I will take this as a warning for my future career. As I went through each busy times in my life, I realize that they are times when my abilities got tested. And, most important, they are tests on my patience, my endurance, and my ability to work with others: face my professors, my peers, my students, and coworkers. Often times I felt so tired and I just wanted to let everything go. (Who invented this whole Ph.D. school system??) School itself is challenging, thinking about funding at the same time is even harder. But then I realized that this is just the beginning. Academicians and researchers too have to apply for grants and catch deadlines. They got rejections from conferences and journals, critiques from peers. What I'm experiencing now is just the training to get there. I should learn how to cope with that to be able to continue in the future.
And that's when all my social networks come to save me. I have friends I could talk to, family I could discuss with, and of course my husband to whom I could share my thoughts and dreams. Without them, I will not be who I am right now.
In conclusion, all these experiences remind me that, while I have to try my best for the present time, all my works now are preparations for the future. I should not complain how busy I am and how hard the work is, rather it's better to practice how to pace myself and take some time in between the busy schedule. I should think of all the experiences as parts of a bigger plan of life. Furthermore, these busy times remind me that I am not just an individual being. Having friends and family is a real treasure in going through them.
1 Comments:
right-o! like dejavu... busiest/most intense time apparently never comes to an end, it'll come again and again and again. who says being an academic is relaxing? ;)
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